I like to think of myself as a pretty optimistic and idealistic person, though some might just call me naive or gullible. I tend to believe what people tell me, and assume that they have good intentions. This is certainly true for the patients at PSI, although some people on the staff are quick to remind me that many of them used to be big-time drug dealers and criminals, and have retained the tendency to lie and cheat. Now that I have been at PSI for almost the entire summer, I have gotten to see how strong of a grip addiction has on some of the patients here. As they say, addiction is a life-long illness. Even if you are clean, when you're an addict, there is always the temptation to use again and fall back into old habits.
The patients at PSI live at the facility for about a year, during which time they are working toward their recovery. Once they graduate from the program, unfortunately, some patients eventually find their way back to their old lives and addictions. From talking to several staff members at PSI, they believe all of the patients here have at least some chance of relapsing. The vocational educator was describing how it is nearly impossible to predict who that will be. Some of the people who she thought were best equipped to succeed in the community ended up relapsing almost immediately after they left the program. Conversely, people in the program who seemed unstable often ended up doing very well on their own.
One of the students in my Health Literacy class - one of my very best, in fact - was kicked out of PSI for using and attempting to sell drugs inside the facility. I was absolutely shocked when this happened, since she was so intelligent, engaged, and a lovely person all around. Literally the day before she was discovered, I had asked my students to respond to the journal question, "When you graduate from PSI, what could happen that would make you want to use drugs again? What can you do to avoid those triggers?" Her response: "There is nothing that could happen that would make me want to use again." What I didn't know at the time was that she had already been sneaking around inside PSI using and trying to sell, and blatantly lying to me in her journal response. I just couldn't understand how she could have me and other staff members fooled like this. She's the last person I would have guessed would relapse while still at PSI.
There is one staff member, the GED educator, who seems to have it figured out. He has been working at PSI for years, and says there is one quality that is a great predictor of who will relapse: arrogance. In fact, he goes so far as to say he has
never met a patient who was arrogant that didn't relapse. That's a strong statement. Maybe it has something to do with admitting that you have a problem that is out of your control. Once you surrender to your addiction, acknowledge it is bigger than you, and admit you need others' help, you're more likely to gain that control back. What are your thoughts? Do you agree?